Picture Post #1

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Hong Kong Hotel Hijinks

SO ABOUT THAT HOTEL ROOM

As I was walking out of the airport in Hong Kong, eager to hop on the MTR, their version of the Metro, a line our pilot had said during his farewell address kept resonating with me, “We crossed the international date line, so Thursday’s gone. Ha-ha.” I knew about the International Date Line, I had checked and double checked my travel itinerary before booking my hotel in Hong Kong. I’m smart. I was certain that I was in Hong Kong for close to 30 hours. Just to be safe, and because the airport had free Wifi, I decided to take another look. I looked at my ticket and back at my itinerary. I changed the time zone on my iphone and it switched to Friday the 30^th. Here is a picture of my itinerary:

THEY SCREWED ME MAN! Have you ever been swindled and pimped out of $70 because of an imaginary line on a globe?! I have now. Although, no hard feeling International Date Line, I know you serve a purpose, and you had to be somewhere. It really wasn’t even your fault. The real culprit is American Airlines. Their itinerary is dead-ass wrong. I did not arrive in Hong Kong on Thursday August 29^th at 5:45 AM, I arrived in Hong Kong on Friday August 30^th at 5:45 AM. How does an Airline whose only purpose (besides making money, cause, you know, capitalism) is to facilitate travel not understand how time zones and the International Date Line work?

But don’t you worry your pretty little heads my friends. As I sit here watching the sun rise elegantly over the misty peaks surrounding Hong Kong international airport, I am internally drafting and editing what will surely be a strongly worded email for my friends over at American Airlines. And if you are lucky enough to know my history in dealing with the customer service branches of large corporations, I like my chances.

Tiresome Traveler (August 30th, No idea what time)

I like to consider myself fairly well traveled. I braved many a long car-ride with my grandmother, sister, and parents. Recently I even drove 16 hours, by myself, from South Florida back home to Centreville. All this pales in comparison, however, when juxtaposed with travelling to Asia. For those uninitiated, I’ll give a timeline of my travels. I apologize for the estimations but crossing time zones and date lines has drained my cognizance of time as well as my acuity.

6:30 AM: Alarm goes off, wake up, shower, eat breakfast, say goodbye to Dad.

7:30 AM: Time I told my mom I wanted to leave for the airport.

7:45 AM: Time we actually leave for the airport.

7:50 AM: Time I expected us to leave for the airport. (Sorry Mom, had to hedge my bets).

~8:20 AM: Arrive at the airport, say goodbye to Mom, check bags, receive boarding passes, go through security.

8:55 AM: Arrive at my gate, 2 hours early.

8:55 AM-10:25AM: Watch Tommy Boy for the hundredth time, laugh more than I probably should.

10:30 AM: Board flight number one, Dulles to LAX. Flight time: ~5.5 hours

10:55 AM- 4:25 PM Eastern (1:25 PM Western): Watch movies in the air/Admire well-formed mustache, and impeccably matching Dodgers apparel of Hispanic male sitting next to me.

4:30 PM-5:30PM Eastern (1:30 PM-2:30 PM Western): Exit first flight, get a cab, go to In’N’Out Burger to see what the fuss is about, see what the fuss was about, walk back to airport.

5:30 PM Eastern (2:30 PM Western) – 6:00 PM Eastern (3:00 PM Western): Go back through security, realize that I’m so early for my flight that I don’t even have a gate yet, sit down outside a Russia Air gate to get my bearings, impersonate fourth member of Russian family that sits next to me, decide that’s weird, find an abandoned gate with power outlets.

6:00 PM Eastern (3:00 PM Western) – 1:00 AM Eastern (10:00 PM Western): Play around on my laptop, Skype the girlfriend, find my real gate, watch the second Lord of the Rings movies (Seriously cannot recommend those enough if you’re travelling for a long time, great time killer).

1:00 AM Eastern (10:00 PM Western): Doze off sitting up repeatedly, resign myself to the fact that I am indeed, going to fall asleep in an airport by myself, wrap arm through backpack with all valuables hugged closely against my chest, set alarm for 10 minutes before boarding, sleeeeeeeeep.

2:05 AM Eastern (11:05 PM Western): Jolt awake to discover previously uninhabited gate is now filled with people.

2:15 AM Eastern (11:15 PM Western): Board plane, find seat, prepare to pass out.

(From here on out I have no idea what time zone I’ve been in or where exactly I am)

Sleep for unknown amount of time, awake to a stewardess asking me to order dinner, order the steak and potatoes, instantly feel mildly guilty since the two Indian businessmen next to me are vegetarian, am asked what I want to drink, order red wine since I am outside the oppressive confines of the United States legal system, Enjoy meal.

Sleep for what appears to have been an absurd amount of time. I woke up once to stand up and return feeling to my gluteus, while I was strolling I asked the flight attendant how much longer we had and she said 6 hours, so for the first snooze I’ll estimate 7-7.5 hours. Once I return to my seat, pass out again, wake up and check the nifty in-flight map and realize we are still over the pacific, grab my laptop, finish watching the second Lord of the Rings movie with my immediate neighbor looking over at the screen, fist bump him when Gandalf comes and saves the day with the rest of the horse-dudes, think about fist bumping him, get too scared, finish movie in silence. Eat breakfast of bacon, what I think was some sort of quiche, and potatoes, again become wracked with mild guilt.

Then I wrote this. I think we are about an hour and a half out at this point, not exactly sure what time it is. My watch says 1:15 PM, but that’s Western time, my computer says 4:17 PM, but that’s Eastern time, and our arrival is going to be approximately 5:50 AM, but that’s Hong Kong time.

Needless to say, I’m well-rested, incredibly confused, and ready to be off of this plane. Good news is I’ll be in Hong Kong soon, and then it’s just an hour flight to Guilin. Bad news is I slept through the time I was supposed to be brushing up on my mandarin, my flight to Guilin is 30 hours after I land, and my hotel in Hong Kong won’t let me check in until 2:00 PM Hong Kong time, or 8 hours after I land.

I’ll try and post this and a Hong Kong edition once I get settled in my hotel room.

 Estimates:

Time spent sitting in airports: 7 hours.

Time spent in the air: 19 hours.